Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Suicide prevention


I just don’t want to call the CAT team


I can’t apply what I learnt as a child

As a way to help another out of suicide.

I cannot cry those tears of desperation

To show my love, that prevented my mother

From taking her life. But I can listen

Like I did back then, to the things,

That psychiatrists judge and diagnose.

I can give enough understanding that may mean

That suicidal feelings can be expressed

Without the need for the actual action of harm

Happening to the self, perhaps, yes perhaps…

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I hear myself scream as I am hauled in socks

Across the road, I cry for help, I am lost,

When that is the policy and procedure

To help someone through suicidal ideation

And unusual states of consciousness.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

My mother feared that enough to know,

Never to see a mental health professional.

I know it enough from my own experience,

To flee when it is mentioned as prevention.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I am looking for something else,

Not what I did as a child for my mother,

But something else, because I’m an adult,

Who knows policy and procedure, but,

Wants to prevent that from happening

As well as the potential suicide…

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

What is and isn’t responsible I feel is warped

In our society, to the point where

Aversion therapy is the legal way

And gentler methods are discarded alternatives.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I don’t want a person that’s hurting to become

Subjected to imprisonment and forced drugging,

Asked about their symptoms and not

Considered as a person with individuality.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

I just don’t want to call the CAT team.

notachemicalimbalance protest T-shirts

2 comments:

  1. oh darling... i support and cherish you whatever state you're in.. i've struggled with mental health issues for so long been labelled restrained involuntary committed it's just shit... the system treats us like dirt and completely fails to see our humanity. as soon as i have money i'm buying one of these shirts.

    solidarity.

    Matt.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Matt, Internet is great in that it allows people to talk anonymously, but sometimes people really need to be with other people to discuss what they need to break through what is tearing them apart. Also, sometimes they don’t want to disturb friends too much, which is why they seek out professionals.
      When I wrote this, I was thinking mostly about what I’ve been studying in class (Art Therapy at Phoenix Inst.) and am unsatisfied with the current measures therapists and psychologists use to protect themselves. I understand that is necessary for therapists to want to make certain they aren’t deregistered or criminally charged with negligence, but feel when the CAT team are called and psychiatrists do their ‘duty of care’ this has been very unhelpful and harmful, in my own experience. Sometimes it is the preventative drugs people are forced to take that cause people to feel so bad that they attempt suicide. This is something that happened to me (over a decade ago), so, I don’t want to put someone else through this when I start working as a peer-support therapist, unless that is something they wish.
      Thanks for the solidarity, really appreciate your voice.

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